Season of Change

A new situation? An old situation? 

At times, I just feel I would love to have a period of time where things would stay still, just for a short time. 

So much has happened in the last few years, months, weeks and even, days.

"Change is as good as a rest." They say...I don't even know who "They" are! I certainly can't agree with them! I HATE change. From the moment I know change is going to happen, I am on edge, I over eat on the chocolate, I go on a "go slow" to draw out the process of change as long as it is possible and I react terribly.

I try to reason with myself that actually, “I love change, change is good, change is a new opportunity to experience life and see what living is about,” all the while in the back of my head, I want to reach for the comfort. The comfort of knowing the people around me, the comfort of knowing my day to day routines and the comfort of being in “control” of my life. 

This summer, for me, was a prime example of how I don’t deal well with change.

In one month, we had about 7 major different situations happening. This was not going to be a fun month L.  The amount of change was off my radar. Instead of being excited about all these situations happening…. I crumbled…. Really badly. I think I argued the most with L this month than ever before, I could not sleep and you guessed it! My chocolate in take went through the roof…BOO!

However, the most important thing that I was missing, was my trust in God. That He would provide us with a home, a job, a church and all these other things that were happening.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t until after the month was over and things actually worked out, by the grace of God, that I sat back and could see He WAS in control, even though I was so OUT of control. If I trust in Him, He is my constant. Everything around me can change, but my relationship with God stays at my core. The process was unpleasant but necessary. God wants us to change otherwise people wouldn’t see His grace so plainly in the light of day.

I felt more confident these past few weeks, where there has been some more changes, that God knows my limits, He knows what I need, not necessarily what I want though, and even in the days of more major changes, HE is my truth and my core.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; - Proverbs 3:5

Be strong and take heart,
Butterflies & Rubies

J